Every time I blog I plan on blogging more, as blogging is something I love to do. I love to write. I love to share what God is teaching me, as He constantly is. And I love to sing praises to my Creator, Father, and King as every detail of my life is His doing. I however every time get boggled down with simply living life, and time seems to run away from me.
Wednesdays are currently the only day of the school week that I'm not working any hours at my outside of my home job. I "only" have two littlest jewels with me, my goal every Wednesday being to play with them and to love on them (which means I usually do not get much accomplished). I have to say that it cracks me up when I'm out with "only" two and I get comments such as, "your hands are full." Today we spent the morning at one of my favorite places, Boulevard, a park that radiates God beautiful creation everywhere I look (which is where the above picture was taken).
Jase is processing a lot these days, asking all kind of questions such as, "do I have a birth dad, where are all of the Ghana and China football players mom (when observing a local high school football team), are grown ups who don't have kids mean, did I sleep in a crib when I was a baby?" Those are the first few that come to mind, him literally saying something every day these days that makes my heart ponder, and ends up in a lengthy conversation with him, him having lots of follow up questions and comments ...
Jase really is the sweetest and busiest little guy. He still gets in to just about everything, and literally every week will still do at least one of his infamous "Curious George" experiments, that leaves us baffled and cracking up both at the same time. He is also such a sweet, affectionate, and loving little guy, him constantly giving me hugs and kisses and words of affectionate. He has started preschool this year and is doing really well. We started him a year ago but pulled him out because it just didn't seem like the preschool was really set up in a way to help him be successful (his impulsive ways were getting him in lots of trouble). Jase loves to keep up with our big kids, while simultaneously he seems to struggle with wanting to be a teenager and the baby of the family all at the same time.
We hear all the time from friends about how their kids LOVE Jase, and how his name comes up all the time. He is such an incredibly GIFT, I can't even begin to describe it nor how amazing he is. All his questions about his story, identity, and future hopes and dreams really has me reflecting back to the months that God pulled at my heart preparing me to adopt again, and to the day at church when God literally flashed his little picture through my mind. I can't help it but also think back to those two weeks that I spent in China with my little guy, just me and him. I really did literally fall in love with him from day one, and Praise the Lord, that the depth of my attachment to him has not faltered, neither has his to mine.
There are many different thoughts and opinions out there on adoption these days. Some articles and blog posts I read and I agree with, and some I read and don't agree with.
Our little Jase has done tremendously well adjusting and attaching to us. I credit this to the nurture and care that I believe he DID receive in China, as he was ready to let us love him and love on him. I also credit it to all of the parenting changes that Sam and I made before we even brought Jase home. We fully parenting him using TBRI approaches - I believe strongly that any other kind of approaches would have failed miserably for many different reasons one of which is his very sweet yes, but also many impulsive mischievous ways. The third reason I think he has done so well is that we all instantly attached to him, and that his attachment to us was almost just as quick. None of these three factors do I take lightly, and all of them I PRAISE my Father for.
People ask us all the time if we are "done" adopting. I honestly don't know the answer to that, only my Father does. I want to with of my heart live a life that is TOTALLY DEVOTED AND SOLD OUT FOR MY KING and I will do whatever He asks me to. Humbly speaking my obedience does not always come immediately but I have learned after repeated experiences and repeated opportunity of humility and faith building, that my Father's WILL is the BEST and that is what I want.
God clearly calls us to live a life of passion and of total surrender to Him, and one where "each" one of us is loving the "least of these". I believe strongly that for each one of us this looks very different. For Sam and I, although we have many other passions (orphan care, clean water, at risk kids in US, child trafficking), it tangibly involves adoption.
We are living a crazy and super blessed life as a family of 9 ... and I, even in the midst of the chaos and feeling completely overwhelmed, I wouldn't have it any other way!!! If truth be told my life is super blessed, while simultaneously at times super hard. Despite what one of my sisters thinks, I am NOT a "super" woman. I do get tired, actually exhausted; I do get overwhelmed, sometimes every day; and I do everyday do something that I wish I had not. I've learned that the only way that I can live the life God has called me to, is to humbly live one that is totally dependent on Him for grace, strength, and Eucharisto.
We adopt ... because there is a desperate need for loving forever families for precious waiting orphans, because we can despite the fact that we have no savings and make a very humble income considering there is 9 of us, because God has called us to, because we do love the sacred gift of parenting each precious jewel that God has entrusted to, and in response to the fat that we have been so incredibly blessed and loved by our Father. I'm so incredibly thankful for that despite all of the reasons that made good logical sense as to why we should not have adopted our 5th adopted jewel, that we still did. I take no credit for that, and so completely praise my Father for working out the details of our hearts that brought us to China to bring home our precious little Jase!
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