Coming back Sunday night from Refresh this year, our hearts were so full. It is difficult to put into words all that God revealed to us during this amazing conference. Getting to speak again in breakouts was such an honour and privilege. I can't help but think back to the so many years ago when I was a 5th grade girl learning how to speak English, and how I as result was pain-staking "SHY." I love that God can even use this once very shy 5th grade girl.
One of the general session speakers especially impacted me. She is an adult adoptee, adopted from South Korea at about the age of 9 and her name is Stephanie Fast. Her story is horrific and miraculous all at once, it being a miracle that she is even alive today. Sam and I both wept as we heard her story. Her story spoke to my heart on many levels.
As I came home on Sunday night and kissed seven sleeping jewels, my heart was overwhelmed. I once again felt my tears and had to fight them back. In actuality I kissed five sleeping jewels, and two almost asleep jewels. One in a very quiet voice said, "I love you mom," and the other one said, "I missed you mom."
As I kissed each one of my jewels, my heart was overwhelmed at the goodness of God that He would allow me the incredibly sacred honour and privilege of being the forever mom to each one of my jewels. I am such a mishap of a mom on some days, even with my best attempts. The reality is that I am far from perfect and I make mistakes every day as a mom, and you know what, my Father knows that about me but somehow STILL CHOOSE me to be each one of my jewel's mom. What an incredibly gift and joy! He brought us together, us having to travel oceans in some cases to be together, and HE UNITED OUR HEARTS and made them "mine" and me "theirs."
My heart was also overwhelmed by the preciousness of each one my jewels, as each one was laying safely in their nice warm beds. Each one was and is safe, my Father made sure of that. Stephanie reminded me of the trauma, abuses, and horrific things that can happen to children everywhere - and I was reminded of the incredible GIFT that each one of my children is safe. That is not something that I take for granted, as I'm all too aware of children growing up on the streets, in orphanages, in war torn countries, without a forever family, without any protection. My children are safe and I praise my Father for that. For several of my jewels, there are details of their lives that I know nothing of. My heart once again grew in compassion and nurture, being reminded of that more than anything my kids need me to be a compassionate gentle and nurturing mom. Teri and Dan Coley, and Deborah Grey, also reminded me of that. That the focus of my parenting with my jewels should be on "relationship" ... and "play." I LOVE that and needed that reminder.
My heart was overwhelmed by the heart of my Father. I'm reminded of Stephanie's story when the God of the Universe audibly told a Swedish nurse, "she is mine." You have to read her book, ya'll. Stephanie was laying in a pile of garbage, breathing her last breaths. This is all my paraphrase. A nurse stopped at the sound of groaning and saw Stephanie but thought there was nothing she could do for Stephanie and so left her to die. Well, leave it to the God of the Universe to intervene. He made it so that the nurse could not move, her legs instantly became heavy, and in an audible voice he said, "SHE, IS, MINE!" Each one of my children are my Father's, "they are his." He yearns for them, cherishes them, and loves them." And He feels THIS WAY about each ORPAHN of the world. The orphan number in the world is so huge I can't even begin to wrap my brain around it, 148 million orphans. What!!!!!!!!!! And then the other statistic, if every Christian would adopt "just one," there would be no more orphan crisis. What!!! The thing about it is, that just how my Father told the nurse, "she is mine," He is telling each one of us that about each little orphan jewel of the world. "He is mine. She is mine," He whispers and hopes we hear and do our part in caring for the orphan (whatever that part is that He is calling us to). This is so huge and can make my heart fall apart into a thousand pieces of I think about it too long.
And so for Sam and I, we will keep doing WHATEVER our Father puts in front of us, at any cost. So yes as most of you know, it means that we are in the process of adding an incredibly precious girl jewel from China - Jewlia Grace. Although if my kids had their way, we would be adding two more jewels, a boy on top of a girl. I love how God has given each one of our jewels the same heart for the orphan that He has put in their daddy and I.
And so for Sam and I, we will keep doing WHATEVER our Father puts in front of us, at any cost. So yes as most of you know, it means that we are in the process of adding an incredibly precious girl jewel from China - Jewlia Grace. Although if my kids had their way, we would be adding two more jewels, a boy on top of a girl. I love how God has given each one of our jewels the same heart for the orphan that He has put in their daddy and I.
Comments